You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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