He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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