So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
