i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
