grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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