Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
She needs sedatives and a leash
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
