the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
