Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
