What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
