I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
