He is an equal opportunity slut.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
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