just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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