adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
