FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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