There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize