i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
