Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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