He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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