Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
