Me. At least after what I've been through.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Randomize
