We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
