I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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