was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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