Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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