i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
