all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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