The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
