i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
