actually, I'm a sock model
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
