the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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