just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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