"it" just moved
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
