she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
