I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize