fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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