I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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