I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
