dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
