? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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