Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
