I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
