Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
babies were throwing up all over the place
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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