Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
