$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Randomize
