no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Randomize