I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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