Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
