You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
id be glad to
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
