we have pet lesbian snakes
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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