you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
