I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
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